In today’s video, I respond to the question: “Should you accept retroactive jealousy triggers?“







Read or watch below to hear my response to: Should you accept retroactive jealousy triggers?



















Zachary Stockill: Many people with retroactive jealousy know that a common part of this disorder is encountering triggers—situations or events outside our control that can spark feelings of jealousy.







In today’s video, I’m going to answer a common question from viewers about triggers.







My name is Zachary Stockill, and since 2013, I’ve been helping men and women from all over the world overcome retroactive jealousy and save their relationships.







If you’d like to learn more about my work or work with me one-on-one, please click here.







For those here for the first time, retroactive jealousy refers to unwanted, intrusive thoughts, obsessive curiosity, and what I call “mental movies” about your partner’s past relationships, sexual experiences, or dating history.







I received a question from a viewer struggling with retroactive jealousy triggers.







D writes: “I have a question about triggers. Is there a way to completely work through them? Some things that are obscure triggers I’ve been able to handle, but other ones still always seem to mess me up.”







So, D asks: “Should you accept retroactive jealousy triggers? Do I have to accept that certain things will always trigger me?”







Thanks for your question, D. The answer is no—I don’t think you have to accept that, and I don’t think you should.







However, there is an important caveat that I’ll explain at the end of this video.







Now, let’s address your main question: Do you have to accept that certain things will always trigger you?







No, that’s not true. You don’t necessarily have to accept that.







There are proven practices, strategies, and techniques from OCD research, cognitive behavioral therapy, and other areas that can help you work through triggers.







There are many ways to manage and overcome them.







Triggers only have power over you when you give them power.







It might sound counterintuitive, especially when you’re struggling with retroactive jealousy.



















When a trigger comes up, it can feel like there’s nothing you can do, as if what happened—whether it’s something your partner said or something else—has control over you.







It can feel like it’s outside of your control, and that you can’t do anything about it, but that’s not true.







Of course, you can try to avoid triggers as much as possible, but sometimes they’re unavoidable.







Certain triggers might even come up frequently in your relationship.







Sometimes a trigger could be something like a street you always have to drive down or something in your home.







In some cases, triggers are unavoidable.







When that happens, it’s important to recognize what is in your control and what isn’t.







If I’m struggling with retroactive jealousy and encounter a trigger… Instead of feeling like a victim or powerless, I need to remember that retroactive jealousy feeds off emotiona...